Kiera loves pictures

We have been going through our stuff getting ramped up for moving. For some reason I left this picture frame out and forgot to put it back under the bed where we have been storing them. Kiera was walking around and the pictures caught her eye. She climbed over everything that was in her way and sat herself in front of the pictures. She started talking and waving to the pictures and at the end of the video you can hear her barking at the Amy's dog who is in one of the photos. Too cute!

Savings galore!

Every week I scour the weekly grocery store sale fliers and plan my weeks meals off those. Almost every item I purchase is on sale, if I can I try to pair it up with a coupon so that I can save even more. If not, I purchase the generic brand item that is on sale. I walk away happy from the grocery store with a 45%-55% savings (my total was $100 but I only paid $55 -$45).
This one was too good to be true and I just HAD to share it. In the Albertstons weekly flier there were cereals on sale for $2.50 and bisquick for $3.34, as long as you purchased enough to hit $10 you got $4 off. Then on top of that they had bonus coupons that "doubled the manufacturer coupons".....well, I had said coupons! So, with the sale, the instant savings, the manufacturer coupons and the double coupons I only paid $3.64 on a tab that should have been $17.26! That is far beyond the normal savings I get - see why I had to share!!!! :) Yea haw, go 75% savings!

Patches

Ever since Kiera got Patches for her birthday, he has become an intricate part of her day. At one point or another, she is either dancing with him, hugging him, laying down with him or picking him up to go somewhere. I wonder, what will it be like when she gets an actual doggie.

Baby K's first

Kiera's first birthday was perfect. The place was decorated with cute little hello kitty decorations and even the yard was decorated for Kiera's birthday! We had great food, family, friends and fun - I guess that letter for that day was "f". She had a great time opening up all of her gifts and all the attention from all of her adoring fans. AND with the help of my mother I was able to make Kiera's complete no-sugar cake & frosting. Yeah! She has officially made it one entire year without sugar and hopefully will make it another one!

The only thing that went wrong was the food - I will definately not be opening up my own catering business any time soon as I would definately lose my business from over production. We had so much food leftover I was trying to send everyone home with a "sack lunch"!

Snuggie

For some reason Kiera took to playing with her snuggie on her head. (little things make her happy - just like her mamma!) One time we were playing peek-a-boo and the next thing I know she placed it on her head and started walking around. Such a silly bug!

Pain

No pain, no gain.  No truer statement could have been said for this time in our life.  With all that 2009 had in store for us, graduation, the move and starting a new job in an entirely new city where we know almost no one, we knew it was going to be a long, tough road.  When we found out we were pregnant, we knew there would a bit more stress added to our already full calendar but it would happily added. Then came the loss of that child.  I honestly thought that I would never have to go through something like this with all the heartache and pain that came with trying to have our first child.  We waited 5 long, painful, heart-aching, years for Kiera’s miracle birth – our doctors told us we had a less than 3% chance of having a child.  I figured that if I experienced one form of pain with wanting children I wouldn’t have to endure losing a child. I was sorely wrong.  There is so much pain that comes with losing a child – physically, mentally, spiritually and heartache.  The aftermath of losing a child is hard to handle – knowing that in all that mess is what should have been your child.  The pain in our heart takes over every rational thought.  You want to gather up all the pieces, no matter how gross that sounds, and hold them. Through all this pain though I have gained so much – so many “I never knews” now known: 

I never knew so many of my friends and family have gone through what I am going through.  It is bond that we now share that can never be broken because the pain is one that can never be forgotten.  When we all get to heaven, we are going to have quite a bit of family waiting for us to scoop them up and love on them!  How I can’t wait for that day.  

I never knew how many people loved and cared for our family.  The prayers promised alone where enough to send me to tears. 

I never knew how strong I could be.  My ability just to live through this situation is surprising.  I feel a bit hollow, that a piece of me is missing but knowing that I will be reunited with this piece of my heart, helps.

I never knew that Paul was such an AWESOME, WONDERFUL husband.  Don’t get me wrong, I did know that Paul is a great husband, loves me and promises that he would do anything for me but to see it manifest physically is amazing.  I have in the past doubted that someone could love me, old-and-busted-me, as much as Paul says he does but I can let those thoughts pass into the past.  He sacrificed his time to stay home with me these past few days, which if you knew his normal schedule, all the papers he is working on and his DP (a form of dissertation), you would understand how steep the sacrifice; he is sacrificing his bring home the bacon life to help me in my stay-at-home-wife duties – HUGE sacrifice, Paul doesn’t cook and hates dishes!  He holds me, comforts me, cries with me, I could go on and on.  But this “milestone”, has taught me to never doubt his “I love you” ever again. 

I never knew that God could give me such peace in a time of such pain.  I still weep and wish I knew the layout of the plan that this will take us on but I know that this is in God’s best plan and interest for me.  I have often tried to forge my own plan and way, as my parents and youth minister can attest to, but every time I end up back on the path to which God laid out for me and am quite relieved and grateful for that paved path.  I know that this will lead to greater knowledge, greater acceptance, greater gratefulness, greater blessings, greater something, I just need to hang on and it will come.  I know that it will take me a VERY long time to get over this and I don’t know if I will have to go through something like this again, I certainly hope not, but I now know that I can do and go through anything because all my “never knews” became “now knows”.

THANK YOU to all of those who have prayed, are praying and have sent of notes of love and support, they are all greatly appreciated and cherished.